Background On Gay Tantra

By Howie Holben

Tantra, a Sanskrit word means to weave, expand, spread or connect. In gay tantra the couple aims to use their opposing flows of energy to reach a deeper connection and level of spirituality. Although many people believe the process is not possible for same sex couples, the increasing numbers of people getting involved shows otherwise. The appeal for many couples is the opportunity provided to become closer and obtain a more complete understanding of their personalities.

Tantra is a system of personal and spiritual development. It is not just about prolonging orgasms or becoming more intimate with your partner although these are common benefits. Contrary to most spiritual traditions Tantra views sexual energy and lust as an integral part of human spirituality and a path to enlightenment. It also involves recognizing darker parts of the personality and integrating those and full sexual potential into the being. The aim of Tantra is to expand boundaries, accept ourselves and dispel guilt or fear and learn about our mystical selves.

The theories which are called tantra come from all over Asia and are built on ancient traditions from Hinduism and Buddhism. Therefore practices can vary a lot between different teachers.

Some traditions of tantra assert that the practice is not possible for same sex couples because the opposing male and female energies are needed. However there are several schools which include gay tantra. Techniques which use the theories of Kundalini energy flows are possible for same sex couples. This is because in Kundalini the rising energy flows are the same in all people regardless of sexual preference or gender. Some traditions use a lot of visualization in their processes. In these cases partners can imagine themselves as being of different sexes when guiding the flows of energy. Sexual preference is viewed as a personality trait in Buddhism and is therefore unimportant in the context of tantra.

Tantric Buddhism was created by a Buddha and his companion Big SkyDancer. The followers of this school of tantra were known for being particularly passionate and devoted to the spiritual path. It was developed by a Frenchwoman called Margot Anand Naslednikoy in the eighties. Her system, called Sky Dancer Tantra is now the most widespread type of gay tantra. It is based on the concept of love as a dance in the sky.

Most tantric practice involves meditation. Breathing is a vital part of the process with techniques involving alternating breaths between partners. Visualization is another common method which has many aspects. It is possible to visualize deities or other magical powers or processes between the two bodies such as movement of energy. Yoga is used to maintain positions and for its meditative properties and focus on breathing.

Tantric massage is another prevalent way to apply tantra. It is not intended to bring about climax but to release blockages of energy in the body. The masseuse builds up sexual energy in the body and then uses that to unblock the necessary areas.

For those who want to learn more about gay tantra there are many retreats, workshops and gurus available. It is easy to find details of these online. Increasing numbers of same sex couples and single gay people are starting to practice gay tantra. There are a range of methods but the main aim is personal development.

Howie Holben is owner and caretaker of Spirit Journeys. Spirit Journeys offers spiritual gay travel opportunities. He is a Reiki and Karuna Ki Master and also a Quantum Touch and Breathwork Practioner. You can learn more about Howie and gay vacations or gay tours with a spiritual focus at